The Art of Procrastination

Things I should be doing right now:

• A video project for www.SerendipityStation.org

• Working on Monday and the Apocalypse Engine

• Paying bills, filing paperwork, reading catalogs, etc. at www.3trolls.com

• Filling out the post-game report from “Once Upon a Time in Tombstone”

• Writing a blog about “Once Upon a Time in Tombstone”

Things I am doing right now:

• Reading web comics

• Cruising the internet for totally awesome and cool things

• Eating

• Watching old episodes of The Adventures of Briscoe Country, Jr.

• Writing a blog about procrastination

As you can see, my stats don't look so good. For me, being productive is the art and science of tricking myself into blowing off one project by doing another. Most of my major life successes have been achieved at the expense of whatever it is I was supposed to be doing at the time. In fact, I wrote most of Monday and the Murdered Man while I was supposed to be writing an entirely different novel, not to mention a live action game. I seem to need a 'straw project' to ignore while I do something else. If I only have one thing I'm meant to be doing, nothing gets done. Kids, don't try this at home. I'm a professional.

The good news is one of the totally awesome and cool things I found was my good buddy Dog doing something mind numbingly geeky and yes, totally awesome and cool. After you're done reading this, pop on over to his tumblr page and listen to him sing from The Canterbury Tales (in Middle English, naturally) to the tune of Billy Joel's “The Longest Time.”

Between Dog and Bruce Campbell, I might well have my hands full. Sadly, having multiple projects on my metaphorical plate doesn't seem to result in more than one thing getting done at at time. And that's a shame, really. Given the length of my average to-do list, I should be the most productive guy on the planet. I am not. In fact, working with me can be awfully frustrating for more traditionally productive types. I generally meet my deadlines, but not with much space to wiggle around in. Douglas Adams once wrote, "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they go by." I don't know if I actually love deadlines, as such, but I do seem to need them if I'm ever going to get anything done.

Perhaps I need the 'juice' that comes from impending deadline doom. Perhaps I need the threat of imminent failure. Maybe I'm just lazy. Whatever the reason, I've had the most success when large groups of friends (many of whom own swords) are eagerly awaiting whatever it is I've promised to produce.

So fear not, friends, readers, and random internet browsers, all of the things on my list will eventually happen. Some of them may even happen tonight. But right now I'm doing this thing right here, and it seems to be going pretty well. Which is more than I can say for Bruce Campbell over in The Adventures of Briscoe County, Jr., he seems to be in a bit of trouble right now. Oh, and here's the link to Dog's tumblr:

Chelmsford, MA
October 15, 2011